We asked people to draw ‘cyber crime’ and we’re worried about them

Most people have a rough idea of what cyber crime is. It’d be hard not to, as the clue is in the name: a sort of criminal activity in the, uh, cyber world.

Despite this, I’ve always had a feeling that people don’t really know what cyber crime is. And, on reflection, the only way to prove this was to see if the public could draw it.

Luckily, The Next Web Conference was taking place, so we had no shortage of tech experts and enthusiasts to ask…

A solid start. This looks like a reference to the Jolly Roger – a flag that pirates flew before they boarded your ship and did all that nasty stuff they’re famous for – but, rather than a human skull, this one is… different.

In my eyes, it looks more like the head of a turtle than a human. Analyzing the curves of the bone, I’d say some kind of mutant turtle. On closer inspection we can learn a bit more. The underdeveloped jaw suggests it was around pubescence, so it’s likely to be a teenage mutant turtle. But why did it die before adulthood? My guess? Fighting. Which means the only truly logical explanation is it’s some kind of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle.

Was the artist implying that people who engage in cyber crime live in the sewers and hang out with rats? I don’t want to put words in their mouth, but yes. Yes they were.

This artist doesn’t mess about. Rather than giving us this content for free, they went straight down the stock photo route – presumably in the hope of making some sweet, sweet scrilla.

Well, I got some bad news for you, pal. This is on our site now. You’re in TNW town. The art is ours.

In an unrelated note, are you or your team interested in commissioning a picture for your piece on cyber crime? Then please email callum@thenextweb.com.

Also, send cash.

Another shout out to the artist for including TNW CEO, Boris, as the criminal in the picture. I always wondered how he afforded such nice suits.

Could you imagine a world where you could travel through computer screens? Delivery times would cease to exist, the pornography industry would be more… interactive, and you could bitch slap every racist, sexist, homophobic asshole out there. It’s making me tear up just thinking about it.

While we’re on the topic of imaginary worlds, how great would it be if life imitated this picture (and old school comic books) and all onomatopoeic sounds were accompanied with huge text bubbles?

BOOM! KABLAMMO! GREAT JOB!

Okay, what happened to the rear of the computer? The perspective balance between the keyboard and screen suggests this artist is no amateur, so why leave it lacking a back? There’s only one explanation: This is a comment about the suspected Russian interference in election, with the drawing suggesting there’s literally no evidence to back this theory up. There are layers to this composition.

Also, if I’m ever hacked, I hope the perpetrator leaves me a smiley face. It’s the little things that make life worth living.

All-in-all, we got a glimpse into some twisted minds and, well, I’m a little worried about the world.

Do you think you could do a better job drawing cyber crime? Well, hit us up on Twitter and show us what you’ve got!