Washington D.C. scumbags are invading Silicon Valley

A team of Republican blowhards are taking their talents to the Bay Area. Their goal? To create chaos on the center stage of the tech universe and provide corporations with the same inflammatory data recently used to turn the 2016 election in Circus Circus: Jerry Springer Edition.

Unconvinced with GOP-lawmakers’ ability to reach the liberal-leaning figureheads at the forefront of the tech world, companies like Definers Public Affairs — a D.C.-based political opposition firm — are taking to The Valley in hopes to sway future conversations. And these conversations, according to the company itself, are set to revolve around dirt, gossip, and name-calling that have come to define American politics.

What else would you expect from a firm whose goal is to shift public opinion and sway lawmakers through counter-intelligence operations designed to sling mud at the opposition?

Tim Miller, previous Jeb Bush communications director and current Oakland-based patsy, pulls no punches in describing his goal. He told Recode:

You have positive content pushed out about your company and negative content that’s being pushed out about your competitor, or regulator, or activist groups or activist investors, that are challenging you. There might be some companies that are more willing to engage in that. Increasingly, as [Silicon Valley] companies mature, I think they may recognize the need to do that.

These comments should surprise no one. Definers is an offshoot of America Rising, a think tank and attack arm of the Republican Party. And now the company — with Miller as its poster boy — want to “connect [tech] with the Republican and conservative ecosystem and [help] them with messaging about how to talk to red-state voters.”

This isn’t inherently bad. Building a bridge between conservative leadership and Silicon Valley is long overdue. The Trump-hating ‘snowflakes’ in The Valley aren’t exactly known for their ability to digest Republican talking points. It’s the way in which the company plans to do it — political theater and corporate mud-slinging — that rubs me the wrong way.

And if this is how they intend to connect with some of the smartest people on the planet, I can’t help but think it’s all going to end very badly. For them, and for us.