A fundamental part of living life as a good human being™ is learning how to be amicably passive-aggressive — or put in other words, unnoticeably mean and cruel when necessary.
A good example is party invitations. Every once in a while you’ll meet a person you feel the need to invite, but genuinely don’t want to be around. Should you go through the risk of being confronted about a skipped invitation or should you just send the invite, and hope they don’t show up? Someone has created a better solution.
Enter Straight2Spam, a new tool that lets you copy a ridiculously spammy snippet of text that should send your email straight to the recipient’s spam box. The best thing about it? It’s been stylized to blend with the background, so it remains undetectable to the human eye.
All you need to do is visit Straight2Spam, copy the snippet, and paste it in your email. The rest is about trusting the spam filters.
Now back to the topic. You want someone’s invite to mysteriously disappear? Problem solved:
So next time someone confronts you about forgetting to invite them to your party, simply tell them the truth: “Oh, no, did you check your spam box?”
God, it feels lovely to be a good human being™.
Look, as brilliant as this concept might be, it’s not bulletproof. If you add the sketchy text to an email sent to a trusted contact — someone you regularly exchange emails with — it’ll still get through the spam filters. That’s what happens with Gmail at least. So don’t be surprised if that person shows up to your party.
My colleague Callum, who I deeply despise but have to regularly email, received my fake invite just fine:
And another heads-up: make sure your email is long enough to actually hide the spammy text when previewing it in your Spam box (or Inbox if things go south). Here’s what I mean:
You should also really pray that the recipient isn’t using a dark theme for their email, because that might get you into some really awkward conversations:
If Straight2Spam sounds like something that came straight out of a comedy sketch, it’s because it does. I won’t drop any spoilers but you should really check out Nathan For You, if you want to see where the inspiration for this tool comes. (Honestly, you should check it out regardless, it’s hilarious.)
In the meantime, you can get the spammy text from this link. Use it responsibly, though — cover your tracks so you don’t look like a schmuck.