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This article was published on June 8, 2017

Craigslist ad for fake dads is the saddest thing we’ve seen today

Craigslist ad for fake dads is the saddest thing we’ve seen today Image by: Melinda Tichelaar
Carissa Lintao
Story by

Carissa Lintao

Writer

Carissa is a writer based in New York. When she's not writing about apps, marketing, or tech, you can probably catch her eating ice cream. Carissa is a writer based in New York. When she's not writing about apps, marketing, or tech, you can probably catch her eating ice cream.

College student Dane Anderson, and his roommates (aka: The Boys), will be throwing a classic Father’s Day barbecue in a couple weeks. Their only problem is that they don’t have any fathers to celebrate with. Because, according to the boys, they “don’t really live with their fathers.”

Their next best idea to solve this dilemma was to hire another father. Buying a plane ticket to fly your dad in is overrated anyway.

The Craigslist ad was posted under the listing: “NEEDED: Generic Father Figure for Backyard BBQ.” Straight to the point, yet tasteful. The barbecue seems to be well thought out, as the boys have specific qualifications that need to be met.

If you plan on applying, here’s what they expect:

  • A minimum of 18 years experience as a father
  • A minimum of 10 years grilling experience
  • An appreciation of a nice, cold beer on a hot summer day

Interested? Well, here’s a few things you’ll be responsible for.

  • Grilling hamburgers and hotdogs — whilst drinking beer 
  • Refer to all attendees as “Big Guy,” “Chief,” “Sport,” and “Champ” — whilst drinking beer
  • Talk about dad things, like lawnmowers, building your own deck, Jimmy Buffet, etc. — whilst drinking beer

Oh, they’re also giving priority to any candidates named Bill, Randy, or Dave. Don’t ask just apply.