Do not stop to think or edit:
You must be the first who said it.
You heard a brand-new band? What luck!
You’ll be the first to say they suck.
In order to increase renown,
add “bacon” to most any noun.
It’s not your job to right a wrong,
just mark it FAIL and move along.
Rather than felicitations,
send your friend an application.
To be an expert’s no great tax:
Write common sense and call it “hacks.”
Your friends won’t like it, on the real,
but you must Flickr every meal.
In disagreements, all your readers
must be branded Nazi leaders.
It doesn’t matter what you say,
just publish it twelve times per day.