Hasbro has the answer for all you forever alone-types that want a cat, but don’t want the feline downside of clawed up furniture, cleaning a litter box or it repeatedly sitting on your keyboard during a marathon session of Fallout 4.
Joy For All is a new range of lifelike robotic pets that aims to bring comfort to the elderly, like, you know, your grandparents that you can’t be bothered to pick up the damn phone and call.
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They only suffered through the Great Depression and fought a world war; what else do they have to do to earn your love?
These fluffy companion animals feature “realistic fur, purrs and meow” and contain sensors that make them respond to petting and cuddles with “familiar cat-like actions,” which I presume means rolling over and latching on to your hand while biting.
If my grandparents were still alive, they’d be terrified of a robot cat, so let’s call this what it actually is, Hasbro — a cat designed for the 30-something World of Warcraft player who lives on frozen burritos, has questionable hygiene and hasn’t seen daylight in several weeks.
If you want your own robotic kitty, you can snag one for $97 on Amazon.
Forever alone, only now with robot companions. Sounds legit.
➤ Companion Pets [Hasbro’s Joy for All]