Madden 17 developers are trying to ruin my life and these glitches prove it

Madden 17 developers are trying to ruin my life and these glitches prove it
Credit: EA Sports

Madden, it’s one of my must-purchase games each year and yet each iteration is slightly more disappointing than the last. The only people that get joy out of this game anymore are the hardcore football fans and the racist teenagers that like to make me cry while playing online. Seriously, it’s a shit storm of epic proportions and I’m a glutton for punishment that forgot my umbrella.

To be fair, the dozen-or-so hours I’ve put into Madden 17 this year have shown real potential. It’s also shown a few glitches that make me believe that Madden developers are cruel, cruel people hell-bent on guaranteeing my unhappiness.

Take this one, for example. Tie game in the third quarter when the Redskins dump it off to the running back on a screen. After breaking a few tackles, the ball pops out after rather weak contact from the Eagles secondary. The Eagles scoop the fumble and start running the wrong way. After realizing the error, the defense reverses course and starts heading the right direction, only to be forced back into the wrong endzone for a … touchdown?

Or there’s this. Apparently Madden developers have a limited understanding of the rules. This, my friends, is a touchback; not a touchdown. The ball should come out to the 25 yard line (new rule this year) where the offense will start their drive. Instead, we get six points and a celebration? I… I’m losing strength…

https://twitter.com/lukezim/status/769673484024721408?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

Here’s a similar glitch. This time, however, it’s on a long field goal attempt. The kicker misses the kick, and the defense catches the ball — a scenario which would normally have the player take a knee in the endzone for a touchback (see above) or — more commonly — running it back for a long gain since most of the kicking team was watching the kick rather than running downfield.

Rules are for pansies; TOUCHDOWN! Start the grill, apply dead animal, rejoice with cheap beer.

These aren’t ideal, but nothing can compare to this glitch from last year’s edition, Madden 16.

Texans kicker Nick Novak appears to have kicked the ball so hard he knocked the physics out of it. Or, perhaps this is like a rather crappy mini-series you may have seen ‘Under the Dome’ where the town was stuck inside a giant, invisible dome. The dome, it seems, runs right through midfield at NRG Stadium.

Have you run into any Madden glitches so far this year? Share them with us so we can share in your misery.

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